Spooky
You may know that I’m a summer lover, but when October rolls around, even I am ready to lay down my sandals and tank tops and give in to fall. I can only do this because October is spooky season, and spooky season is like a kind (skeleton) hand that holds my hand and says “there there, I know you’d still rather be sitting by a pool in perfect 80-degree weather, but look at all the candy and costumes and different versions of Tim Curry we have over here?”
(Some of you will argue that spooky season starts after Labor Day. FALSE. I don’t want to see any of your pumpkins or lawn skeletons or giant furry spiders until OCTOBER FIRST, MA’AM.)
I like to celebrate spooky season by watching spooky and spoopy movies, buying tiny pumpkins, and planning elaborate Halloween costumes that I may or may not actually wear. However, as a general scaredy cat, I will NOT enter any haunted houses. Haunted hayrides? Maybe, those are in motion and so there is a sense that I am consistently being whisked away from the terror. A house? Where I’m trapped and the only way out is to keep encountering more and more horrible situations? NO THANK YOU. Many years ago I went with group to “zombie laser tag,” which was like a haunted house where you have a mission, and even then I found myself screaming alone in a corner until one of the zombies had to lightly aaaarrrrggghhh me back in the direction of my friends.
But you know what I do like? Seeing other people get scared by haunted houses. Specifically, this photostream of people being scared inside Nightmares Fear Factory, a haunted house in Niagara Falls, Canada. It’s like that moment on a roller coaster where they snap a photo of you taking that big plunge, but instead they’re snapping a pic when you’re being scared out of your mind. Here’s how they describe themselves:
NIGHTMARES FEAR FACTORY, located in Niagara Falls Canada, has been on the cutting edge of sheer fright for over 40 years. Often imitated but never duplicated, NIGHTMARES is the longest running and scariest haunted house in North America, possibly the world.
Come see for yourself and witness the haunted halls of the once industrious Cataract Coffin Factory. While inside be closer to your friends and family than ever before as you hold on to one another for dear life. Your time with us depends on you and will range from 15 seconds to 15 minutes.
Do you dare enter Niagara’s 2-Time Attraction of the Year?
NIGHTMARES FEAR FACTORY is the World’s Most Frightening Experience.
Over 160,000 have chickened out…IT’S THAT SCARY!!
I can tell you right now that my time with them would definitely be closer to that 15-second range. Or really, I would just be waiting outside with a candy apple while my masochist friends go inside.
The people who choose to do this are truly brave and, thankfully for me and all of you, their photos are hilarious. Someone at my job shared this with me last year, in the middle of the work day, and I nearly lost the rest of my day scrolling through every page and dying with laughter. Because when you think you’ve seen the most hilarious photo, like this one:
You click to the next page and there’s another contender:
The real heroes are the ones who chose to go through by themselves. (Or maybe they just got separated from their friends, like I did in zombie laser tag). Was this guy OK??
I’m also amazed by the people who remain completely stoic. Have they been through it before? Or are they such spooky season pros that it takes more than a jump scare for them to scream? Like this girl in the front—how is she so chill while her friends are losing their minds?
I could basically copy and paste every single photo from Nightmares Fear Factory into this blog post, but I’ll let you go on your own journey and destroy your own work day. I promise it will be worth it.
In the meantime, I will be watching scary movies through my fingers, trying on all my wigs, and eating all the tiny boxes of Nerds that I can hold. HAPPY SPOOKY SEASON!